"Zoo"
By: Edward D. Hoch
The children were always good during the month of August, especially when it began to
get near the twenty-third. It was on this day that the great silver spaceship carrying
Professor Hugo's Interplanetary Zoo settled down for its annual six-hour visit to the
Chicago area.
Before daybreak the crowds would form, long lines of children and adults both, each
one clutching his or her dollar, and waiting with wonderment to see what race of strange
creatures the Professor had brought this year.
In the past they had sometimes been treated to three-legged creatures from Venus, or
tall, thin men from Mars, or even snake-like horrors from somewhere more distant. This
year, as the great round ship settled slowly to earth in the huge tri-city parking area just
outside of Chicago, they watched with awe as the sides slowly slid up to reveal the
familiar barred cages. In them were some wild breed of nightmare--small, horse-like
animals that moved with quick, jerking motions and constantly chattered in a high-
pitched tongue. The citizens of Earth clustered around as Professor Hugo's crew quickly
collected the waiting dollars, and soon the good Professor himself made an
appearance, wearing his many-colored rainbow cape and top hat. ``Peoples of Earth,''
he called into his microphone.
The crowd's noise died down and he continued. ``Peoples of Earth, this year you see a
real treat for your single dollar--the little-known horse-spider people of Kaan--brought to
you across a million miles of space at great expense. Gather around, see them, study
them, listen to them, tell your friends about them. But hurry! My ship can remain here
only six hours!
And the crowds slowly filed by, at once horrified and fascinated by these strange
creatures that looked like horses but ran up the walls of their cages like spiders. ``This
is certainly worth a dollar,'' one man remarked, hurrying away. ``I'm going home to get
the wife.''
All day long it went like that, until ten thousand people had filed by the barred cages set
into the side of the spaceship. Then, as the six-hour limit ran out, Professor Hugo once
more took microphone in hand. ``We must go now, but we will return next year on this
date. And if you enjoyed our zoo this year, phone your friends in other cities about it.
We will land in New York tomorrow, and next week on to London, Paris, Rome, Hong
Kong, and Tokyo. Then on to other worlds!
He waved farewell to them, and as the ship rose from the ground the Earth peoples
agreed that this had been the very best Zoo yet. . . .
Some two months and three planets later, the silver ship of Professor Hugo settled at
last onto the familiar jagged rocks of Kaan, and the queer horse-spider creatures filed
quickly out of their cages. Professor Hugo was there to say a few parting words, and
then they scurried away in a hundred different directions, seeking their homes among
the rocks.
In one, the she-creature was happy to see the return of her mate and offspring. She
babbled a greeting in the strange tongue and hurried to embrace them. ``It was a long
time you were gone. Was it good?''
And the he-creature nodded. ``The little one enjoyed it especially. We visited eight
worlds and saw many things.''
The little one ran up the wall of the cave. ``On the place called Earth it was the best.
The creatures there wear garments over skins, and they walk on two legs.''
``But isn't it dangerous?'' asked the she-creature.
``No,'' her mate answered. ``There are bars to protect us from them. We remain right in
the ship. Next time you must come with us. It is well worth the nineteen commocs it
costs.''
And the little one nodded. ``It was the very best Zoo ever. . . .''
